Partner Marion Glass

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Shirley Willer | Making Gay HistoryShirley Willer (September 26, 1922 – December 31, 1999) was an American feminist and activist. Willer joined the Daughters of Bilitis (DOB) in the 1950s and became the president of the organization a few years after. Because of her energy and dedication, she helped to revolutionize the homophile movement in the 1960s and helped pave the way for future civil rights advancements for the gay community.[1]

Shirley Willer was born on September 26, 1922 in Chicago, Illinois. Willer's family consisted of her father, Arthur C. Willer, her mother, Theresa, and her younger sister, Doris. While her father was a native of Illinois, her mother was originally from Austria and received American citizenship in 1919. Her father worked as a salesman for the Prudential Life Insurance Company in Chicago for many years before he became a judge.[2] Arthur, a heavy drinker, often beat his wife and so, in 1931, Willer's mother packed her and her younger sister into the family car and fled. To make ends meet, her mother worked split shifts, leaving Willer to manage household activities.[3]

Willer obtained a bachelor's degree in nursing at the University of Chicago.[4] She later went back to school at the University of Iowa to obtain her master's degree in nursing.[5] In 1941, at age 19, Willer discovered she was a lesbian during a nursing class lecture about mental hygiene. The lecture discussed common terms used to describe people who find individuals of the same sex attractive. The professor stated that lesbians are not attracted to men and oftentimes develop crushes on women. Willer reflected on the lecture and realized that she was a lesbian. Later in an interview, Willer stated that at this moment, she thought to herself "Oh, gee, I'm one of those things!" She had thought everyone was like that. She never understood why other girls got excited about going out on dates when she preferred the company of other women.[6] After the lecture, Willer spoke with her professor about identifying as a lesbian. Her professor, appalled by her statement, sent her to a psychiatrist who Willer saw for six months. When Willer returned home that evening, she came out to her mother. Disgusted, her mother stated, "Where did I go wrong?"[4] It took a few weeks before Willer's mother began to accept the fact that her daughter was a lesbian. Willer's mother gave her the book titled The Well of Loneliness, which discussed other lesbians’ experiences on coming out.[3] After reading through the book, Willer was disturbed to find that related words for her sexuality were described as "pervert" and "queer."[7] She developed romantic feelings towards her cousin. Her aunt did not approve and forbid Willer to see her daughter ever again.[3]


MMarion Glass

For most of her life, Willer worked as a registered nurse at the Albert Merritt Billings Hospital in Chicago. She often worked 16-hour shifts due to nursing shortages due to World War II. During her time as a nurse, she filled many different positions, ranging from psychiatric nursing to working with Argonne National Laboratory. Argonne National Laboratory contributed to the Manhattan Project, which helped build America's atomic bomb.[8] After living in Chicago, Willer visited California and lived in San Francisco.[7] In 1962, Willer moved to New York City. Soon after, she joined the Daughters of Bilitis (DOB), the first lesbian civil and political rights organization in the United States.[8] During her first DOB event, she met founding member Marion Glass (also known Meredith Grey) and they became a couple. Though Willer and Glass remained together for their entire lives, they never married.[3] For Willer, marriage was unnecessary, "We don't believe in possession of people" she declared. However, she always emphasized the importance of commitment: "You're a couple of people who love each other... if I am stronger than you I'm going to lift that heavier thing."[4] Willer eventually became president of the DOB[9] but left the organization during the late 1960s.

After leaving the DOB, Willer and Glass moved to Key West, Florida where they spent the last years of their lives together. They opened a rock shop which was quite profitable. The also founded the Marion Glass Domestic Abuse Shelter. They both took part in the growing lesbian and gay community in Key West, with Willer serving as an active member until she died of heart failure on December 31, 1999.[10]


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